Relationships are full of ups, downs, and many in-between stages throughout the areas of your individual lives as well as your time together. When you’re in a long term relationship or with someone you care greatly about, communicating properly and often is the biggest part of maintaining a balanced and healthy state for both of you. But communication is much more in-depth and complicated than we realise and it can be difficult to understand or keep up with.
As a means to help you with better communication, I’m sharing some tips below.
Watch Nonverbal Cues
When it’s difficult to speak about something or we are feeling overwhelmed, our nonverbal cues often speak for us and let others know what is going on in some way. You should try to notice and analyze your partner’s actions or demeanours and how those change depending on their mood or thoughts. You can use these to give yourself an idea of how you can better support them or what you can ask without pushing too far, or notice when you are pushing too much.
If you doubt your loved one’s thoughts or actions you shouldn’t jump to conclusions right away. Instead, try to ask questions before assuming what they’re feeling or thinking or what meaning is behind their actions. Try to ask more open-ended questions that allow for elaboration but don’t push for it such as how did you feel about ____ or what’s on your mind today. This helps both of you not stress and can improve the security and openness in the relationship.
One of the biggest excuses or reasons behind relationships not communicating well or properly is time constraints such as work or responsibilities. Try to make time to talk with each other or even set aside a specific time in your day or week to sit down and ask questions about how you’re both doing as well as talk about anything you need or want to discuss. This can also help you both adjust to communicating more and slowly learn to be more comfortable speaking up.
Avoid Bottling It Up
Sometimes when you’re feeling overwhelmed or haven’t spoken up enough about something that is bothering you it can all explode out at once in an aggressive way. This can lead to fighting, hurt feelings, pulling away from each other and more negative communication patterns. So try to avoid keeping things buried when you’re struggling and encourage your partner to do the same. Make it known that both of you can trust each other with hard information and can ask to talk when needed.
Both people involved in a relationship need to be patient with each other when it comes to communication, especially if one or both of you deal with other mental struggles or a lot of burdens. Remember that this won’t come instantly or super easily all the time, it’ll take effort and patience to be able to find a routine that works for you. Not everyone communicates in the same way or interprets things the same, so there are bound to be mistakes or struggles.
Being able to pause and understand more about what communication really means to you and your partner as well as how you can successfully do so can mean a lot in making your life and relationship much easier. You can utilise communication as a way to bond more with your loved ones as well as a way to better be understood or understand them, which will help with your relationship’s longevity and overall health. You can also use these ideas in other forms for other areas in your life where you need to be heard or hear others.